Halloween has come and gone. I am definitely one of those people who would put my Christmas tree up in September, but I try to hold off until late November.
With that being said I love the holiday season…I am thriving this time of year.
The only thing I do not look forward to is the drama that comes along with gifts, family, etc.
I only see my extended family on holidays, specifically Christmas. This means that at the ripe old age of 22 (that was sarcasm) theres a lot of pressure on me to have my life all figured out.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, but I can definitely go without the numerous games of 20 questions.
Over the years I have found some ways to get through the holiday drama mostly unscathed, heres 10 Ways to survive the holidays…
Keep it short and sweet
It may feel like you have to explain your choices and your life to your family, but you don’t. If someone asks a question, keep the answer short, but sweet. Try not to come off defensive, just simply answer the question asked in a way that you are comfortable with and move on. You do not owe anyone an explanation.
The intentions are good
As annoying or intrusive as they may seem, the intentions are to catch up and make sure you’re doing well. Of course, they may also be nosey, but take it at face value.
Smile and nod
With family comes unsolicited advice, as much as you may not agree or want the advice they give you, its a lot more drama and effort to argue. Mygo to move is just smile and agree, you never have to take the advice you don’t want, but show them you appreciate their opinion. Just say okay and do whatever the f*ck you want.
Your life is not to be aired for everyone to watch. You’re entitled to keeping parts of your life private and shouldn’t be held accountable for other peoples curiosity. With social media it has become more accepted to ask personal questions at family gatherings, you have a right to be uncomfortable sharing intimate details of your life.
This is important so pay attention…I always have a plan on what time I will arrive, what time I will leave, and I even plan out some responses for the commonly asked questions. This way you are as prepared as you can be. I have major social anxiety especially when it comes to my family, the more control I have in the situation, the more at ease I feel.
Enjoy the time
Try to remember that family is precious and some people do not have it, enjoy the time you have with them because you never know if you’ll get this chance again. Let go of the negativity and be grateful to be surrounded by warmth and love even if you’re the only one spreading it. Make it a point to forgive past grievances and live in the moment.
*IF YOU ARE OVER 21* Try to limit your alcohol consumption, gatherings can be much harder to navigate drunk. As much as alcohol may make the holiday a tad bit easier, try to stay present and aware of your actions.
If something makes you uncomfortable, say no, set boundaries. Just because you’re related to someone or love them dearly, does not mean you have to talk about everything with them. You also do not have to listen to every opinion and agree with it. Of course, if you can get past something with just a smile and a nod…do it. But if you have a trigger or something makes you uncomfortable, speak up. You do not have to be put in a position where you are uncomfortable especially with loved ones.
Stay away from relationship talk
Whether you’re single, dating, engaged, or married; stay away from relationship talk. Unless your partner is with you at a family event, your relationship shouldn’t be brought up for everyone who is not involved in it. If you’re single that okay too, do not let others dictate your timeline. Marriage and baby talk are fun but try not to go into detail about your choices, that is between you and your partner…plus who wants to be told how to run their relationship?
You don’t have to have it all figured out
Everyone puts their best foot forward, no one wants to come off as a mess or clueless. The truth is no one has life figured out…including your family. As much as it may seem like they have the answers to everything, they only know what they have been through in their life, they do not live the same life as you. its okay if your five year plan is different than theirs or non existent. Its okay if your career or goals do not make sense to them. Its okay to not have life figured out.
The holiday season is for spreading cheer, keep this in mind throughout the season and enjoy the time you get to spend with your family. I know these ten steps make family gatherings sound horrific but its just an overview of the possible issues some encounter when visiting with family. I love my family dearly and cherish the time I spend with them!
Do you have any tips on how to get through the holidays with family? Leave a comment below!
10 Helpful Tips for Surviving the Holidays with Family
10 Helpful Tips for Surviving the Holidays with Family 10 Helpful Tips for Surviving the Holidays with Family 10 Helpful Tips for Surviving the Holidays with Family 10 Helpful Tips for Surviving the Holidays with Family