Hey guys! If you didn’t notice (who am I kidding, you definitely didn’t) I took a little break over the holiday week and it was really nice! I go tot spend time with the boyfriend and his family and just relax a bit, but I missed writing so much!
Today I want to talk about adulting. It is way harder than anyone ever let on and boy it is kicking my butt!
I feel like I work just to pay the bills and sometimes it makes me so frustrated that I want to cry, but 90% of the time I can keep my composure.
I made a ton of stupid mistakes when I first started “adulting”, I moved in with a toxic boyfriend, got points on my license, neglected bills…and guess what? It is all coming back now. Something I thought I could leave in the past and run away from, I now have to face.
As much as I am kicking myself for being so stupid, I am also thanking myself for making these mistakes at a young age. Yes, I killed my credit, but I am young enough that I can repair it and learn from it for the future. I may have gotten a few points on my license but I am a safer driver now.
I wont lie, saying this stuff and meaning it is hard, i wish I could go back to being a kid more than anything, I wish someone would cut me some slack, but thats not how life works.
I bet theres a ton of people in my exact situation, who got kicked out of the nest too early due to some unfortunate event, we are all just trying to grow and learn and honestly bare minimum, stay alive.
I definitely have a ton of regrets, from when I was a kid, to not going to college, to racking up debt, to moving out early. These are all things I cant change…so why am I stressing over them?
I could sit here and pout all day about how unfair the world is…or I can make it my bitch.
I have so many plans for my life and so many people I love, that I wouldn’t have if my life went perfectly up to this point.
I definitely wouldn’t be the person I am today without the shit I went through, and I am pretty proud of who I am. I wont lie to you, I really wish life was different, but wishing wont pay the bills.
I think the worst part is that all my friends live at home, have their bills paid, don’t have debt, and have a support system behind them. I know theres so many people out there struggling who need support and aren’t getting it because they had to grow up faster than others.
This probably seems like a lot of venting but I promise theres a point, without struggle, the good days aren’t as good. When I have a great day, when I can pay my bills on time and spend time with the people who love me, I cherish those days so much more than I would if it happened all the time.
I think we forget that life is short, we don’t have a ton of time on earth and we never know when our time is up, I get so hung up in the stresses of adulthood I don’t see the beauty in it.
I get to see the babies I know grow, and teach the kids I know what I didn’t learn when I was young. I get to be the person I needed and didn’t have growing up.
I could sit here and think about how much I miss my childhood, or I can live in the moment, because before I know it this stage of life will have past in the blink of an eye and Ill be sitting there, at 30, wishing I enjoyed my 20s more.
As humans we often want what we don’t have, straight hair wants curly, kids want to be adults, and all vice versa. That if we stopped to think that somebody somewhere wishes they could be exactly where we are right now, wed take more pride in our circumstance.
How to be a successful adult? I don’t think I will ever have the answer, but I promise you, I am trying to figure it out.